I had my first job interview in what feels like years today. I won’t say where but it is a well known company in London.
I am usually very good in an interview setting, although inside I am falling apart until the last minute.
I got to my interview 45 minutes early which is good, but that also meant there’s more time to panic. I have been known to panic so much to the point I turn around and don’t even go to the interview. I build it up to be the most terrifying thing ever. Which in a way, it is.
A lot of my anxiety stems from an intense fear of embarrassing myself or being judged. The issue with interviews is, that’s the point, to be judged.
It was a group interview which makes it even worse.
I decided to use my spare time to write some thoughts down. Some are a bit like poems, others are just quotes.
The main one I wrote again and again was:
It’s okay to be afraid as long as you try.
So that’s what I did. I tried my best and that’s all I could do.
I thought I would share some more of my thoughts here as I found it so helpful to get them out on paper right before taking a deep breath and being the best version of myself possible.
We are all in the same boat
But what if this boat sinks?
Don’t fret it will stay afloat
But what if the winds take us away?
Don’t fret everything will be okay
It’s okay to be afraid
It’s okay to want to run
But it’s not okay to give up
You must try your best
It’s all you can do.
People rushing past me
I wonder where they’ve been
Or where they’re going
Their faces a vision of focus
Their eyes glued straight ahead
I steal a look once or twice
But we quickly divert our gaze
We have all been places
We are all going places
You Sir, are you okay?
Excuse me miss would you like a hand?
I would like very much to understand
How we all live alone in our minds
But we’re never really alone
Everywhere you look there’s people
Happy, sad, depressed or other
Why cant we all be kinder to eachother?
Instead people rush past me
And I can’t help wondering
Who they are
So there’s a little insight into the mind of an introverted anxious interviewee.
Hope you enjoyed!